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EOS Popcorn Ep. No Idea
Fug it, I guess we're doing this thang?
Welcome back to another jaw-dropping episode of EOS “mudda-fuggin” Popcorn, a show starring the many fascinating characters of the EOS community. A show that might make you laugh, or make you cry, or might even make you shart. An exemplary contribution to the world of crypto journalism held to the highest of Cryptowriter standards. EOS Popcorn is kind of like 60 Minutes on good crack laced with fentanyl. If this is your first time tuning in, buckle up and prepare to be amused.
Over the last year, there had been sporadic calls for EOS Popcorn, but it wasn’t until our dear friend and Voice CEO @salafel made the ultimate gaff…
…that I got a bit of an itch to make a return. You see, I’m a man of the people.
It definitely didn’t hurt that some former stars were ready to rejoin the party.
Fred likes his popcorn with extra butter.
I found myself sitting there, emersed in the nostalgia of:
Kurt’s festive sweater
MaxDapp’s sensual lips
Justin’s filthy room
Justin’s lone pube sitting on a keyboard in Justin’s filthy room
Colin’s bald head and massive ego…
My heart yearned for the many faces of Rami.
I started coming to the realization that Popcorn had actually touched the lives of many people within the EOS community. It helped them feel desired. It helped them feel a sense of community. It helped them understand their emotions and release their inner demons.
EOS popcorn is therapy.
When rumors first began swirling surrounding the halting of B1’s vested tokens, former child actor, billionaire entrepreneur, politician, and best buddy of B1 CEO Brendan Bloomer, Brock Pierce swooped down in what was perceived by many as a reactionary attempt to “help” the EOS community.
Too little, too late. After over a month of discussions, the EOS community had already reached a consensus that B1 had failed to amply deliver and urged the ENF and BPs to shut off the faucet to B1’s vested tokens and a deadline was set.
While the clock was ticking, BPs signed a proposed multisig to remove the vesting of B1’s tokens.
Brendan and Brock had been in cahoots for quite some time.
B1 failed to deliver what was required by the deadline and the contract was executed.
“Gimmie that back boy!”
Brock’s panties were suddenly in a bunch and finger-pointing ensued. Claims of “no consensus” after over a month of community discussions.
Let’s give @Jesta187 a warm welcome to Cryptopopcorn in what may or may not officially be his first appearance.
Oh snappity-snap! Big Brock sell-off incoming?
Congrats to @brockpierce for officially completing his community initiation proceedings.
Speaking of screwed, does anyone remember that time when B1 planned to penetrate Africa?
B1 accuses exchanges of neglect, but let’s remember Scatter was the most used EOS wallet for years and received zero support from B1.
Sounds like a job for the recently dissolved Public Blockchain Engagement division. Welp.
Meanwhile in EOS GOV…
“…the new history of ‘confiscation’”
“How do I take that to Bullish?” I mean you’re like the CEO bruh. Don’t be a pussy, walk the walk.
Speaking of “Bullish,” here’s a classic.
I ❤️ “Stache”
Oh no he didn’t! You can’t block the fuggin’ "Stache,” Blumer. Big mistake.
🥰I love when the crab shows his sensitive side. 🥰
And hot off the press from the Helios Lobby on discord, cooler heads prevail. Discussions with BPs and B1, etc. are still underway.
Say it with me people.
Brock, Brock, Brock, Brock, Brock, Brock, Brock, Brock, Goooooooo Brock!
Thanks for tuning into this episode of EOS Popcorn. I hope you enjoyed all the drama. This is an incredibly important moment in time in the history of EOS. Since ICO I can’t remember a time when the community has been as aligned and has had such clear paths towards funding. It’s truly amazing that so many of you had enough belief to stick around after being dragged through the muck for the last couple of years. Now that the battle-tested EOS community is standing on its own two feet it’s time to make something of the opportunity that sits before us.
As I’m sure all of you know, Crypto can be incredibly consuming. I just want to remind people of what I often have to remind myself and that is how important it is that we make a serious attempt to find a balance and prioritize our relationships with our kids, wives, family, and friends. Take a break every once in a while. There’s no reason crypto can’t be fun and we all can’t laugh at ourselves from time to time. Slanging tokens and NFTs around and living in a space where you can be a part of a community and at times make crypto magic money out of thin air is fucking dope. Be grateful for it and take a break when you’re not. Cheers -S
Lastly, although somewhat speculative, I think Simon does a nice job of theorizing on the series of events that got us here in the thread below:
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